Where Do I Even Begin?

Where do I even begin?

Do I say, “we told you so”. Because we did, but what good will that do now?

Do I say, “hey white folks, you’re on your own now.” That would be a lie, because just because we’re witnessing human rights violations against white bodies, doesn’t mean they won’t continue to disproportionately criminalize, attack, and unalive Black bodies as per usual.

Do I say, “How does it feel to see someone that looks like you, treated in this manner?” I could, but I already know the answer all too well.

For me, it’s not even cathartic to watch so many white people piping up for the first time to proclaim that this is not the America they know, that things are different now, that they are terrified to see someone who looks like them being killed unjustly by government-sanctioned parties. I don’t even feel vindicated to see so many white people surprised that complying and being innocent are not enough. I don’t feel justified seeing them witness the absolute shock that it doesn’t matter what’s on camera, because the narrative will be rewritten right in front of us.

Am I angry? You know it? Am I feeling bitter? Absolutely! But beyond all of it. I am annoyed.

I’m annoyed at the audacity of folks who voted for this type of behavior, being surprised to receive the advertised outcomes. I’m even more annoyed with those same folks who are now backtracking, apologizing, and feeling victimized that folks are distrustful about their motives.

I’m irritated by the demands for help directed at the Obamas and Kamala Harris, like it’s their job to swoop in. Y’all could have voted for that lady, and most of you chose not to, so leave her alone. Obama ain’t been in office for over a decade, leave that man alone, too. It is literally not their job to save us.

I’m pissed seeing white women on the internet begging Black Women to tell them what to do now. How to deal with the overwhelm, and how to move forward? Honestly, the best I have to offer is “Welcome to the club, Sis.”

And if I’m being completely honest… I’m also irritated with myself. Because I know for a fact that it doesn’t matter how I feel about things. It doesn’t matter if I’m feeling angry or bitter or irritated. ALL THE THINGS THAT ARE HAPPENING ARE STILL HAPPENING.

So what now? Being indignant won’t get us anywhere. Tearing each other down won’t get us anywhere either. But you know what will absolutely not move the needle?

Trying to convince Black folks that this is not the time to air frustrations. It is absolutely the time.

We have been yelling at the top of our lungs for over a century about the injustices all around us. And to be fair, there are plently of white folks who have always been down to yell and fight with us. But the majority have not. And if we don’t speak up now, we are likely to end up with laws that protect white folks, but leave the rest of us still fighting for our lives, starting this whole crap cycle all over again.

It has happened before with white folks accepting that segregation was legal with Plessy vs Ferguson, and even before that when white folks were debating what fraction of a person Black people deserved to be because of the impact it would have on voting and taxes.

The cruel reality of the situation is that white folks have been getting swindled since before the country was even founded, and this current administration is the result of over two centuries of organized efforts convincing everyday people to pick fights with each other instead of keeping the government accountable to the people they’re supposed to be serving.

At the end of the day, I’m glad more white people are finally seeing the light, and unfortunately, with the way our society is set up, the more regular white folks get on board, the more likely we are to get out of this mess.

I’m seeing folks in the bike community post pictures of Alex Pretti, a white man who was shot and killed by an ICE agent on Saturday. They are beside themselves, not just because he was murdered, not just because he was innocent, not just because he was white, but because he was a cyclist.

I’ve been telling y’all “Representation Matters” for ages, out here writing articles and giving speeches on the power of representation, both good and bad. But none of that has been nearly as effective as folks seeing images of that regular-looking white man in his cycling jersey. Some people REALLY get it now. I bet a lot of them have a picture of themselves or loved ones that looks very similar, and the idea that it could have been them really hits home. Rest in peace to that man, he did not deserve to die. And that is the whole point, none of us do.